When Life Gives You a Lyme...
When life gives you a "Lyme", you make "Lyme"ade?? Ha! Sorry, excuse the ridiculous pun, but it's kind of funny, right? I guess the point is, when life throws something at you that really sucks, you need to try to make the best of it... and, I'm trying. Really, I am. But it's just so hard.
So, what does chronic illness look like anyway?? Well, I suppose it's different for everyone and every situation is unique. But, for me, it looks like this...
It's daily supplements, pills, and tinctures at an attempt to manage my symptoms (and 99% of these are not covered AT ALL my the medical system). It's disturbed sleep from skin crawling with itchy hives that won't let up no matter what I do. It's irritability, and restlessness, and a sore, achy body when I don't have time to be sore because I have 3 children to raise. It's adjusting to a new way of eating, where my diet is so limited that sometimes I really have no idea what to even eat. It's dropping to 98 pounds and having to hear "you need to eat!" as if I'm not eating and trying desperately to gain weight. It's constantly turning people down that are trying so hard to just get me out of the house; friends that offer to drive all the way out to my place to pick me up AND drive me all the way back home just so I get out of the house (and I still turn them down)...oh, how I love my beautiful, understanding, compassionate friends... It's waking up in the morning with swollen hands, feet, eyes, and/or lips, and hoping when I go to bed at night that I won't wake up with a swollen face because I actually have somewhere I need to go in the morning. It's having nothing left to give at the end of the day, even though I have to find SOMETHIMG to give because, well, I'm a mom. It's depression, anxiety, fear. It's just plain awful. BUT...
It also looks like this...
It's God whispering in my ear, "You are going to be ok. You can do this. I am here"... It's falling down, but getting back up. It's watching people rally around me, having an amazing support system, having a group of people diligently and sincerely praying for me. It's clinging to God's promises daily, hanging on to the hope that is in Him because sometimes that really is all I have left. It's knowing that no matter what God loves me and will not leave me, even if I doubt or question Him. It's knowing that there is a plan, and even if I don't know that plan I can trust that He is in control even if my life feels like it's not. It's watching my husband stand beside me when some would run away. It's not giving up, it's fighting back, it's pushing forward and pressing on because I will NOT be shaken.
This is my favorite song right now, I call it my anthem...
Casting Crowns: Oh My Soul
I'm not alone, and neither are you...
So, what does chronic illness look like anyway?? Well, I suppose it's different for everyone and every situation is unique. But, for me, it looks like this...
It's daily supplements, pills, and tinctures at an attempt to manage my symptoms (and 99% of these are not covered AT ALL my the medical system). It's disturbed sleep from skin crawling with itchy hives that won't let up no matter what I do. It's irritability, and restlessness, and a sore, achy body when I don't have time to be sore because I have 3 children to raise. It's adjusting to a new way of eating, where my diet is so limited that sometimes I really have no idea what to even eat. It's dropping to 98 pounds and having to hear "you need to eat!" as if I'm not eating and trying desperately to gain weight. It's constantly turning people down that are trying so hard to just get me out of the house; friends that offer to drive all the way out to my place to pick me up AND drive me all the way back home just so I get out of the house (and I still turn them down)...oh, how I love my beautiful, understanding, compassionate friends... It's waking up in the morning with swollen hands, feet, eyes, and/or lips, and hoping when I go to bed at night that I won't wake up with a swollen face because I actually have somewhere I need to go in the morning. It's having nothing left to give at the end of the day, even though I have to find SOMETHIMG to give because, well, I'm a mom. It's depression, anxiety, fear. It's just plain awful. BUT...
It also looks like this...
It's God whispering in my ear, "You are going to be ok. You can do this. I am here"... It's falling down, but getting back up. It's watching people rally around me, having an amazing support system, having a group of people diligently and sincerely praying for me. It's clinging to God's promises daily, hanging on to the hope that is in Him because sometimes that really is all I have left. It's knowing that no matter what God loves me and will not leave me, even if I doubt or question Him. It's knowing that there is a plan, and even if I don't know that plan I can trust that He is in control even if my life feels like it's not. It's watching my husband stand beside me when some would run away. It's not giving up, it's fighting back, it's pushing forward and pressing on because I will NOT be shaken.
This is my favorite song right now, I call it my anthem...
Casting Crowns: Oh My Soul
Oh, my soul
Oh, how you worry
Oh, how you're weary, from fearing you lost control
This was the one thing, you didn't see coming
And no one would blame you, though
If you cried in private
If you tried to hide it away, so no one knows
No one will see, if you stop believing
Oh, how you worry
Oh, how you're weary, from fearing you lost control
This was the one thing, you didn't see coming
And no one would blame you, though
If you cried in private
If you tried to hide it away, so no one knows
No one will see, if you stop believing
Oh, my soul
You are not alone
There's a place where fear has to face the God you know
One more day, He will make a way
Let Him show you how, you can lay this down
'Cause you're not alone
You are not alone
There's a place where fear has to face the God you know
One more day, He will make a way
Let Him show you how, you can lay this down
'Cause you're not alone
Here and now
You can be honest
I won't try to promise that someday it all works out
'Cause this is the valley
And even now, He is breathing on your dry bones
And there will be dancing
There will be beauty where beauty was ash and stone
This much I know
You can be honest
I won't try to promise that someday it all works out
'Cause this is the valley
And even now, He is breathing on your dry bones
And there will be dancing
There will be beauty where beauty was ash and stone
This much I know
Oh, my soul
You are not alone
There's a place where fear has to face the God you know
One more day, He will make a way
Let Him show you how, you can lay this down
You are not alone
There's a place where fear has to face the God you know
One more day, He will make a way
Let Him show you how, you can lay this down
I'm not strong enough, I can't take anymore
(You can lay it down, you can lay it down)
And my shipwrecked faith will never get me to shore
(You can lay it down, you can lay it down)
Can He find me here
Can He keep me from going under
(You can lay it down, you can lay it down)
And my shipwrecked faith will never get me to shore
(You can lay it down, you can lay it down)
Can He find me here
Can He keep me from going under
Oh, my soul
You're not alone
There's a place where fear has to face the God you know
One more day, He will make a way
Let Him show you how, you can lay this down
'Cause you're not alone
Oh, my soul, you're not alone
You're not alone
There's a place where fear has to face the God you know
One more day, He will make a way
Let Him show you how, you can lay this down
'Cause you're not alone
Oh, my soul, you're not alone
Songwriters: JOHN MARK HALL, BERNIE HERMS
thank you for sharing;;God bless you and your beautiful family;;i have LD for over 20 yrs and your witness for our Lord;;Yes He will get you through;;;enjoy those beautiful ''blessings'' He has given you and your wonderful husband;;;time goes fast and one day you will see them all grown up and married with their own children;;cherish this time together;;even if it is in bed;;read to them, play games;;watch good movies;;pray, sing, read God's word together <3
ReplyDeleteThank you for the encouragement :). Yes, I've had LD for 19 years but just diagnosed in the last couple of months. It's been a journey... one that I wish I didn't have to take. But, God has been with me every step if he way...
ReplyDelete