Let's Get Real
I am not perfect. Infact, I am so far from it that it would be safe to say that I am the complete opposite of the word. I fail. I fall. Flat on my face. I yell at my children. I snap at my husband. My house is currently a mess. Martha Stewart I am not. I read my morning devotion and pray for my day, then follow by snapping at my kids instead of walking in the fruit of the spirit which I just finished praying about. I don't make my bed. School rarely starts before 10...ok, usually not before 11. I struggle. Am I being negative? No, just honest. If we could all just get a little real with eachother...with ourselves...with Him. Could we just be honest for a minute? Could we just take off the mask and say what's on our mind? Could we lay it all down at His feet?
I am so thankful that each day is a chance for a new start. If it wasn't, I don't think I could bear it. As I sit and fret about the mistakes I have made, today alone, and wonder if I will ever get it right, a wave of mercy washes over me and I get it. I think I finally get it. He knows I am not perfect. He knows I never will be. But, He loves me anyway. I am overcome with joy. A joy that can only come from Him. How could He love me. ME! I don't understand. I can't understand. I don't need to understand.
As I write this, tears well up in my eyes. If you know me, or are on your way, you may know this is a rarity. It's not that I am sad, really...I am just so overwhelmed. I want to do better, to be better. Perhaps all this is my guilt talking. When I put the kids to bed tonight, they were both quite un-cooperative. And, I was so exhausted from the day that I did not deal with their resistence in a very graceful way. I know that I cannot always deal with everything perfectly. But, I just wish I was one of those moms who always has the grace and patience even after a long day to deal with her children lovingly...does she really exist? I don't know.
God's grace gets me through. I need Him. I am lost without Him. That's a start. I know I cannot do this alone. I will fail. I will fall. Flat on my face. I will yell. I'll snap. My house isn't going to clean itself. But, He will pick me up. He will give me strength. He will see me through. He will send me people (and has) that will get honest with me, too. People that aren't afraid to be real. People who will love me anyway. He will wrap His arms around me and tell me that I will be ok. That I will make it. I don't have to be perfect, because He is. And, though He knows everything about me-the good, the bad, and the even worse-He still loves me. ME! A sinner. Yes, He loves me anyway.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y8BBCYFAYRI
I am so thankful that each day is a chance for a new start. If it wasn't, I don't think I could bear it. As I sit and fret about the mistakes I have made, today alone, and wonder if I will ever get it right, a wave of mercy washes over me and I get it. I think I finally get it. He knows I am not perfect. He knows I never will be. But, He loves me anyway. I am overcome with joy. A joy that can only come from Him. How could He love me. ME! I don't understand. I can't understand. I don't need to understand.
As I write this, tears well up in my eyes. If you know me, or are on your way, you may know this is a rarity. It's not that I am sad, really...I am just so overwhelmed. I want to do better, to be better. Perhaps all this is my guilt talking. When I put the kids to bed tonight, they were both quite un-cooperative. And, I was so exhausted from the day that I did not deal with their resistence in a very graceful way. I know that I cannot always deal with everything perfectly. But, I just wish I was one of those moms who always has the grace and patience even after a long day to deal with her children lovingly...does she really exist? I don't know.
God's grace gets me through. I need Him. I am lost without Him. That's a start. I know I cannot do this alone. I will fail. I will fall. Flat on my face. I will yell. I'll snap. My house isn't going to clean itself. But, He will pick me up. He will give me strength. He will see me through. He will send me people (and has) that will get honest with me, too. People that aren't afraid to be real. People who will love me anyway. He will wrap His arms around me and tell me that I will be ok. That I will make it. I don't have to be perfect, because He is. And, though He knows everything about me-the good, the bad, and the even worse-He still loves me. ME! A sinner. Yes, He loves me anyway.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y8BBCYFAYRI
If that always patient mom exists... I doubt she has any friends... LOL... I think an important part is that we try again...
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